The number one rule of womanhood

 The number one rule of womanhood is you never ever ever ask a woman if she's pregnant.  NEVER.  I mean, even if the baby is coming out...don't even hint at it!

We were hiking yesterday and I let this lady ahead of me.  I said "Go ahead, I'm slower".  She said "You're pregnant right?"  

😕😟😠😭😡😢😱

Larry quickly said, no but we have 4 grandkids!  HA!

So the rest of the hike, that's all I could think about.   I eat really good, I exercise every stinking day.  I close all my rings on my apple watch so faithfully.  I guess I could use the excuse everyone else is using right now...pandemic??  I really don't know. I've gained a few pounds but geezzzzzz.

You see, I've birthed 3 kids (granted it was 24 years ago-but still).  That poochy belly is my badge of honor.  It reminds me of the amazing body that God has created.  My body stretched to an enormous size.  And out of that misshapen body, I now have my 3 beautiful grown adult kids now and now my grandkids!

That pooch shows me that I'm not perfect.  I still have work to do.

That pooch reminds me to watch what I eat and to keep on exercising.

But this is my body.  

Words hurt.  I've dealt with hurtful words my whole life.

Words can also change someone's life for the better.

So women,  if you feel the need to say something to another woman, please just say "YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!"

Or "I Love your hair today!"

Or anything along those lines.   You have no idea where someone is in their journey.  Having babies makes crazy bodies.  But they are beautiful.

Let's be an encouragement to one another at all times.  But especially now.

Don't worry be Happy!

This year has been weird.  I'll admit, I have fought some depression at times.  Sometimes the heaviness of everything going on around us is hard to bear.

So what do you do when the sadness sets in?

Things to avoid:

Social media- sometimes the arguments are just too much. take a break or limit your time on it.

Sugary foods- I know it feels like you need "comfort food" at this time, but the sugar will just leave you with empty calories, more weight and an unfulfilled need for more.

Negative people- limit your time around the people that drag ya down or are always negative (this coming from an Eeyore-too! Yikes-gotta work on it so much!)  You can be an encouragement to them (and they probably need it!) but it's easy to slip into their negativity.

Being inside-Get out and get that Vitamin D!  Sometimes, just sitting by the pool, or taking a walk around the block will really boost your spirits.

Laying around-the more we lay around, the more we want to lay around!  Getting moving can get your blood flowing and get your mind in a better place. 

Things to do:

Get up and dance!

Sing loudly!

Hoop! or do your favorite hobby!

Yoga! or stretching or moving or walking or Aerial yoga even! (my sister teaches it!!!!)

Smile, even when your face doesn't feel like it. 😁

Eat well.  

Self care.

Read the Scriptures!!

Take a shower, change the sheets, make the bed.

Start a grateful list and put it where you can see it everyday.

Call someone.

Do something for someone else.

Take vitamin c, magnesium, good multivitamin, probiotic, cod liver oil  DAILY!

His Mercies are new EVERY MORNING!!  Thank you Lord!  Every day the sun comes up, it's a new day.  There's much to be thankful for!  Just look around you!!

20 Difficult things to do

Things that are difficult that they never tell you (in no particular order):

1. saying goodbye
2. learning new habits
3. being the bigger person
4. keeping your mouth closed/or not commenting
5. walking away
6. changing the saying on the letterboard
7. knowing when the avocado is ready to eat
8. when/how to help or not help
9. self care
10. getting the perfect weather to fly a kite
11. what to do when things don't go your way
12. striking a match from a matchbook
13. learning what truly matters
14. knowing when to let go and when to hang on
15. how much to be involved
16. unclogging the kitchen sink
17. hanging up a picture when the hanger is in the middle of the picture
18. saying I'm sorry
19. loving with no return
20. not buying stuff at Target

When things don't turn out like you thought they would

Life has so many twists and turns.  You are going along just fine, you think your life is on this certain trajectory and then boom... something changes.

And then there's the times that you expect something to turn out a certain way...and it just flat out doesn't.

Expectations can cause some major anxiety and a lot of disappointment.

I live in Eeyore world.  I always see the rainy cloud, the glass half empty blah blah blah.

But I'm married to Tigger.  Thank the Lord.

He can see the positive in almost everything.  Even the bleakest of the bleak, he can pull something positive out.

I remember many many moons ago, he came home unusually early from work and said "I have good news and bad news."  Which would you like first?  Well, me-I want the bad news first.  He said "I lost my job!"  Ok, how you gonna pull some good news out of that one??  Then he said, the good news is we get to go home for Christmas!  He turned a sad situation, into a happy, family time.

Rarely does life go the way you expect it to.  I generally get disappointed at the people around me, including myself.

But it's all in the perspective.

Is my expectation the "right" way.  Maybe it is, but maybe there are other ways.

Sometimes I just gotta go all Elsa and Let it Go! Let it Go!

Do you have a Tigger in your life?  Everyone needs one, or needs to be one for someone else! 

Life's tough.  There's gonna be disappointments.  People won't always be or do the things you'd like.  

I can only change myself.  I can only work on me.

And that's a lot of work!

True connections

Here's a comment I hear more and more often when I see people face to face:  "Oh yea, I saw that on Facebook".

Everything's on Facebook now.  We feel like we are connecting with people because we post stuff and people like our statuses.  When we finally see someone what do we talk about because they already know everything that's going on in our lives from facebook.  They know what our dinner looked like, what our kids are doing, what our workout was like.  So is there even a need to get together?

That's a rhetorical question.

There's a scene in the movie "Wall-E"  where everyone is rolling around on little hover crafts (because people don't walk anymore in the future) and they all have a screen in front of them where they can talk to images of people.  Then one day one of the person's screens turns off and they look around and see that there are other actual living people out there!  And stars!  And a real living world out there!

I do enjoy the convenience of social media. It's a way we can communicate with lots of people at the same time.

But let's not forget the human element.

We need face to face contact with people.  That's the way God designed us.

We need interaction and real communication with each other. Not just "oh I saw that on Facebook".  But getting down to a deeper level with people.

Communication can be divided into five levels:

1. Level of acquaintance
2. Sharing of information
3. Sharing of ideas
4. Sharing of emotions
5. Gut level sharing

Social Media, texting, and email pretty much stays at level 2. How can we get past this and get to a deeper level of communication with people?

It's tough because it requires an element of vulnerability.  I don't like sharing my heart on my sleeve. 

But it's nice to be truly connected to people in a way that social media can't fulfill.

Some ideas on how to get past level 2:

Pick up the phone and talk to someone
Ask them more than "How are you?"- Ask how they felt about something
Talk about more than just the weather or facts...get down to opinions and emotions
Write a card or letter and snail mail it to them
Pray with someone

How have you connected with someone today?

What did you just say to me??

Ok so this getting older thing is tough.   I've never had any problems with my weight.  But now that I'm in my mid 40s it is really getting difficult!   My metabolism is.....dragging.....so.....slow!

I've been on a kick for about 4 months to watch what I eat.  Not dieting necessarily. But getting back to healthy foods.  I've also been making an effort to exercise.  I've been getting on the treadmill 2-3 times a week.  I've been hooping mostly every day.  I'm super trying!  My job has gotten a lot more stationary  & sedentary so I've tried to make up for that by walking at lunch etc.

It's tough but I feel like I've been making a go of it.   I haven't really lost any weight.  But I've maintained. Hopefully built some muscle up in the process.

I haven't felt great about myself.  But I've felt good about getting back in shape.

And then....

I was at a store the other day and I ran into a person (I wouldn't really say a friend-just an acquaintance).  I hadn't seen her in a long time. And we started chit chatting.

And then she says to me, " So when are you expecting?"

REALLY???

My youngest is almost 18 years old!!

Do I look THAT pooched out??

There are some things that you never EVER say to someone!  And this is on the top of the list!!  Why would this even come out of someone's mouth?  Don't they know the rules of human kind and womanhood??

Well, I just stood there and with a sarcastic voice said, "No, I'm just fat."

I didn't know what to say.

Now all this to say... I know I'm not overweight.  Just above what I'm comfortable with for my body.  I know it'll take some time to lose.  Probably a lot longer than it took to gain!

But people!  Let's watch our words with each other!  One little word can make some ones day or completely defeat them.  Her one little sentence set me back so much mentally and emotionally.

Our words have power.  God gave us the ability to encourage one another!  Let's find the good in people and build each other up!

Choose your words wisely!  You never know what others are going through.

Proverbs 16:24

Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.

P.S.  Children are a blessing! I'd be happy if I was pregnant--completely shocked-- but happy!  I think it's great to have lots of kids.  And this woman was probably excited about pregnancy --as she was expected a grand baby.  But still!  There are some things that you just don't ask people...wait till they tell you!

Dinner Time Dilemma

Do you ever feel like you can't get things done?  I know you mammas with little kids do!  I was there once upon a time.  You felt like everything you were doing was being undone right behind you!

Well, I've been out of that stage for a while but I still struggle to get things done in a day.  I'd like to start my day by reading God's Word.  Thankfully this has become a great habit and I rarely struggle with getting this done.  I'd also like to get some form of exercise done in the day, whether it be walking or hooping, just something to get moving!  My job is very stationary now so I need that extra push to get up and move!  I've been so-so about accomplishing this.  The only time I have to do this is in the evening.  Our apartment doesn't have laundry in the apartment so we go downstairs to a community laundry room.  On the days that I do laundry, I can get a good walk in either outside or on the treadmill, while I wait for the laundry to finish.

The thing I struggle with the most, I really always have, is making dinner!  I absolutely hate going to the grocery store.  I hate the whole process.  The making the lists, then shopping, then lugging it all to the car, then lugging it all inside, then putting it all away.  Yuck. And I'm really not too fond of cooking either! :o

I can't get inspired to menu-plan for the week.  Then when I get home from work, I'd rather just eat a bowl of cereal or go out somewhere.

Dinner time is the time of day I'm the least hungry.  My family has never been very scheduled so we've never been in a good habit of sitting down together.  Kids are all grown now and it's just me and Larry, so I don't see the point.  No motivation.

I like to eat healthy, so I know it would be better for us to plan our meals at home.  I've looked at all the web sites that you can put in ingredients and it spits out shopping lists for you.  But it just seems like so much work!

My family doesn't complain about it at all.  They've been great scavengers!  I don't know how you mommas do it that have big households!

Well, no resolutions here.  Just something I've always struggled with.  Anyone else?  If you have any thoughts, comment below!  I'd love to hear how you all handle the dinner dilemma.

Complaining

It's too hot.
The a/c went out at the house.
No body talks to me.
They won't listen.
The a/c went out in the car.
The coffee's out.
The internet is down.
I hurt my toe.

Wah....wah...wah...wah..

I tend to complain a lot.  I've referred to myself as Eeyore at times.  My first reaction is usually No!  But I've been really focusing on not complaining these past weeks.  It's a verse that I taught my kids when they were little a  long ago.  Philippians 2:14 "Do everything without complaining and arguing,"  But I just recently noticed the second part of that verse... " so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people." 

I want to be a shining light in the world.

I'm not great at it yet.  I spent the better part of yesterday in a state blah.  But I am trying.

It is cooler this week.
The a/c guy came out quickly.
Some one cares.
I need to pray about that one.
Car was fixed.
I'll drink tea.
It's ok I have other things to do.
It'll be ok.

I am blessed.